Opinion "Oh, Africa, who will we support in the final? Neither World Cup finalist could beat Cabo Verde in 90 minutes. At least we’ll always have that. The Continent 18 JULY 2026 | ISSUE 245 29 C O M M E N T lee nxumalo THE 2026 Fifa World Cup is almost over. With no African team remaining in the tournament, we’re left with a final that could have only been conjured in the depths of hell: Spain vs Argentina. Spain, the land of lisps, male-pattern baldness, and olés. They love their churros and chorizos as much as they love monkey chants, usually directed at Black footballers, and occasionally Muslim ones too (see: that friendly against Egypt). At the intersection of both identities is a curly-haired, blonde- tipped starboy named Lamine Yamal (thank you, Equatorial Guinea), whose fancy footwork can make a grown man fall over or weep, or both. Their rivals in the final are their former colony, but don’t cry for Argentina. In fact, no more songs for them. The last time the men’s national team got on a bus singing, it sounded like a Ku Klux Klan karaoke night. On the pitch, they’re every bit as nasty; a gang of short, shin- kicking terrorists cosplaying as Italians. The only team less worthy of support is the United States of Evil." 1/2 #argentina #usa #spain #racism #WorldCup #palestine