This extends into how we can problematize the idea of "male socialization" of trans women. There is actually a lot more complexity and nuance to this construct that deserves discussion, but I will discuss another day. What I see among trans women is that we are often, before transition, already taking on the role of "human giver." We minimize ourselves, subordinate our own needs to those around us, we give our emotional, physical, and intellectual labor to others and rarely ourselves. This isn't necessarily universal, but it is common. We have often internalized some idea of ourselves as being givers, likely influenced by the types of characters and narratives around women and girls we see in media. This often shows up in our relationships, often failing to be able to take up much emotional space, struggling to voice or express our needs, and giving of ourselves to our partners. I think of my asexual transfem friends who subjected themselves to something similar to SA because they believed they owed their bodies to their partners. I think of my transfem friends whose partners, often cis straight women, became toxic or abusive when they came out, because for the first time in their lives they had needs, emotions, and took up space in the relationship. This was perceived as a threat to the cis women that were their partners - because only one person can be a human being and the other has to be a human giver...or at least that's the heteronormative narrative.